Ephesians 4:22-25 (AMP) That, regarding your previous way of life, you put off your old self [completely discard your former nature], which is being corrupted through deceitful desires, and be continually renewed in the spirit of your mind [having a fresh, untarnished mental and spiritual attitude], and put on the new self [the regenerated and renewed nature], created in God’s image, [godlike] in the righteousness and holiness of the truth [living in a way that expresses to God your gratitude for your salvation]. Therefore, rejecting all falsehood [whether lying, defrauding, telling half-truths, spreading rumors, any such as these], speak truth each one with his neighbor, for we are all parts of one another [and we are all parts of the body of Christ].

So many of us put our faith in Christ as our Savior, but fail to allow Him to be our redeemer, our healer, our restorer. Christ has done everything He needs to do to be one with us. God lives in me, He sees me, He hears me, He loves me and He understands me. People may not always understand you, but Jesus will always understand you.

I have recently gone through a great heart ache. People in our church have recently walked away from ours to go to another in our area. As pastors it is hard because it feels like a divorce (or that is what those who have never had a divorce would think it feels like). I had a dream about one of them last night. It was a dream of when he and his brother were younger, with short curly hair. In my dream I wept. I also imagined myself using something to dull the feeling of pain. That is something I have never done in the natural, so why would I dream about that?

Galatians 5:16-17 (AMP) But I say, walk habitually in the [Holy] Spirit [seek Him and be responsive to His guidance], and then you will certainly not carry out the desire of the sinful nature [which responds impulsively without regard for God and His precepts]. For the sinful nature has its desire which is opposed to the Spirit, and the [desire of the] Spirit opposes the sinful nature; for these [two, the sinful nature and the Spirit] are in direct opposition to each other [continually in conflict], so that you [as believers] do not [always] do whatever [good things] you want to do.

I have recently been reading about the time in David’s life when his son Absalom was against him. You can read about their tumultuous relationship in 2 Samuel 13-18. David did not send orders to end Absalom’s life. He asked for them to have mercy on his son, the son that was trying to overthrow him. I often think about how we want God to take revenge for us to those that have done us wrong. My husband made a good point yesterday and I have been asking God to help with my heart change. We have have every right to feel the way we do when someone wrongs us…in the natural. However, when we are born again we have to submit those feelings to the Kingdom and let go of our rights.

David writes during this time in Psalms 26:11 (AMP), “But as for me, I shall walk in my integrity; Redeem me and be merciful and gracious to me.”

Psalms 139:23-24 (AMP) Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart; Test me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way.

I cannot allow these hurts to hold me back. I cannot beat myself up for them coming up sometimes either. I have to change my focus. I have to allow the Holy Spirit to heal me from the inside out. Remember, Jesus understands. David did have his moments when he cried out to God to hide his iniquity. Psalms 38:16 (AMP), For I pray, “May they not rejoice over me, who, when my foot slips, would boast against me.” We want to hide in our shame. We want to close the doors to our bedroom and not let the light shine in so we can stay in the bed all day long. Let Christ in!

Let me know how I can pray for you today. Let me know if you have moments like this too, or if you are in a season right now that is hard to get out of. I want to pray with you! You can email me at amanda@desiringformore.org.

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