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Sisterhood of the wounded

James 3:10 (AMP) Out of the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. These things, my brothers, should not be this way [for we have a moral obligation to speak in a manner that reflects our fear of God and profound respect for His precepts].

Gossip is a hard thing not to do, especially among hurting people. I have done it, even within a week. What happens when two people get together that have been hurt by the same person. They share the hurts. Why do we think it is okay in the moment? It is because we think we are not sharing what the person does not already know about the other individual. It is a hard cycle to break, but I want to be better. I have a moral obligation to speak in a manner that reflects the fear of God regarding His created.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (AMP) Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening]. Love never fails [it never fades nor ends].

I did not release why I was hurt, until they released why they were. How can you forgive what cannot be forgotten? I am here to tell you it is hard, but forgetting is not what we are commanded, it is the forgiveness. It does not sting as much. I have learned to pray blessings over that individual. I pray that the Word becomes alive to them.

I know that the hurt was an attack of the enemy. Why? It came from the twisting of His Word. As leaders we should not feel that it is up to us to build the church. He does. When we use tactics to grow our churches, even though it may cause hurt (premeditated), we are wrong. Why? My growth should not see you as a stepping stone or a casualty to kingdom building. Notice it is not a capital K in kingdom here, because that is not His Kingdom we are building.

Philippians 2:3 (AMP)  Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit [through factional motives, or strife], but with [an attitude of] humility [being neither arrogant nor self-righteous], regard others as more important than yourselves.

This is just an example of how easy it is to rehearse it again. It is hard to forgive when you cannot forget. The enemy used a perfect tool here, another who has to respond to the Father just like you do (James 3:1). This is not the only hurt, but it was the most recent. I never wish that on anyone. I have to put my trust in God and who He calls, even if. I have hurt people, but instead of saying that it is part of ministry (which is not true, it is part of my imperfectness) I want to do better. I want to glorify Him. To hurt each other and call it ministry is false. We are to sharpen each other, not wound (Proverbs 27:17). It is to bring is closer in relationship to the Father.

Hebrews 4:12 (AMP) For the word of God is living and active and full of power [making it operative, energizing, and effective]. It is sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating as far as the division of the soul and spirit [the completeness of a person], and of both joints and marrow [the deepest parts of our nature], exposing and judging the very thoughts and intentions of the heart.

Let me always be sensitive to the Word. Even though I was hurt and was wrong it still does not give me the right to repeat the matter. It still does not give me the right to rehearse the matter. Why? I fear God more than my rights. I do not want to displease the Father, not because of fear of punishment, but because I honor Him. I honor His precepts. I honor His Word. I do not want to be so prideful that I exempt this area from His correction. I am looking for the best in those and speaking blessings over them. Praying for a deeper relationship for the Father. Praying for forgiveness for them as they will have to stand before the judgement seat, just like I will. Repenting and asking God to bridle my tongue when I start to rehearse (ultimately cursing with my mouth). Woah, to me when I do such a thing. Instead of creating a sisterhood of the wounded, let us be a sisterhood of the hopeful. Let us hope again! Let us praise again!

Abba, You are the Glory that we wake up and sing to every day. We long to be in Your Presence. Thank You for sending Your Son to be the Light and to restore us. We are sorry for making things about us. We repent for every time we rehearsed a wrong, whether it was for our gain or someone else’s. We are sorry for gathering together as wounded. Help us be to speak blessings over those who have done us wrong. We want to love deeply because You love deeply. Our awe of You compels us to follow Your Word. Holy Spirit Your voice to be louder than the voice of deception. The voice of deception will tell us to fight against flesh and blood. The voice of deception will tell us that because we do not forget that we will never forgive, therefore, never being pleasing to God. The enemy want us to stay walking wounded, but because Jesus overcame, we are over-comers. We choose forgiveness today. We choose love today. We choose hope today. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

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Marathon, not a race

Psalms 119:32 (AMP) I will run the way of Your commandments [with purpose], for You will give me a heart that is willing.

Last week I spent time with my mother at Panama City Beach, Florida. The beaches in the Gulf of Mexico have white sand. They have some of my favorite beaches. Gulf Shores, Alabama, being my top favorite. Panama City is where my mother, and sometimes my grandmother, would take us during the summers. The places we stayed growing up had an old Panama City feel, and the place we stayed at this time reminded me of my childhood. My grandmother would have celebrated her 80th birthday that week.

hile on the beach, where I spent most of the day, I read. I love the written word. I do not read fiction. I read books by authors like John Bevere, Lisa Bevere, Tommy Tinney, Joanne Weaver, Lysa Terkeurst, Joyce Meyer, Lisa Harper, Bob Goff….I have an extensive library. I not only read the revelation of others, but I also read the Bible for myself. Right now I am reading the Bible chronologically and I am about a third of the way through (I started about 120 days ago).

This verse above stood out to me. Sometimes we think that God will run the race for us. Have you ever heard this statement: “It’s a marathon, not a race”? When someone sets out to do a marathon, they have to train. When someone starts running, they cannot expect themselves to do a 5K the first day out. When we start to desire more of the things of God, we cannot expect to sit and pray for two hours, when we have never prayed more than at meal time (the same with reading).

How can I want to do this, you ask? Make a plan and execute it. This verse says do it with a purpose. If it is something we think we are “suppose” to do and don’t, then guilt will set it. Guilt is the biggest lie of the enemy when it comes to getting into a deeper relationship with our Father. It will cause us to run away from Him instead of drawing closer to Him.

So pick up that book study that has been calling you to grow deeper. Spend some intentional time in prayer. Turn off the television, You Tube or whatever you like to listen to to get your Word for the day and start reading it for yourself (good teaching should be a supplement to add to, not your be all). You might start out with a chapter a day…I did. The first time I read the Bible completely through was when I was forty (twenty two years after I received Jesus as my Lord and Savior). That was last year.

We are all at different levels of training for the marathon. Do not get distracted or feel guilty for not running as fast as others. Just keep running, He is the wind that is pushing you along. He will give you the heart that is willing!