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How we treat people matters

Ephesians 5:1-2 (AMP) Therefore become imitators of God [copy Him and follow His example], as well-beloved children [imitate their father]; and walk continually in love [that is, value one another—practice empathy and compassion, unselfishly seeking the best for others], just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and sacrifice to God [slain for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance.

How we treat people matters to God. I was in prayer yesterday and God told me to turn to Ephesians 4:30, “And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God [but seek to please Him], by whom you were sealed and marked [branded as God’s own] for the day of redemption [the final deliverance from the consequences of sin].” I am a context girl, so I read the verses around it.

Ephesians 4:29 (AMP) Do not let unwholesome [foul, profane, worthless, vulgar] words ever come out of your mouth, but only such speech as is good for building up others, according to the need and the occasion, so that it will be a blessing to those who hear [you speak]. 

Ephesians 4:31-32 (AMP) Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor [perpetual animosity, resentment, strife, fault-finding] and slander be put away from you, along with every kind of malice [all spitefulness, verbal abuse, malevolence]. Be kind and helpful to one another, tender-hearted [compassionate, understanding], forgiving one another [readily and freely], just as God in Christ also forgave you.

The Book of Ephesians was written to the church of Ephesus, which means it was written to people who had received Christ as their Lord and Savior. At the moment, my husband and I are in a series about Relational Maintenance and we are taking the verses from Ephesians 5 and breaking down how we can apply it to our every day lives. Like I said, I am a context girl and when I see the word “therefore” that means that this is not the starting point of the thought. We grieve the Holy Spirit when we are not becoming imitators of Christ. This is not referring to winning the lost, healing the sick and raising people from the dead. We have been given the authority to do that at sons and daughters, but it is not referring to your position as a child of God. As a child of God, that is an imitation of the Father, an ambassador (2 Corinthians 5:20). Does my character reflect His? There are two words in the Greek that are used for son, teknon and huios. Teknon refers to child or heir, huios refers to maturity and the mannerism taken on.

Can I grieve the Holy Spirit as a born again believer? Yes. How? By not maturing into huios, becoming an imitator of my Father. What are some checks in myself? When I am talking are my words building up? Do I take the chance to tell it like it is about someone? Do I repeat a wrong? Do I spread resentment or strife? I had someone do that to me recently and it has taken me a moment to think better about the person they were talking about. They said something to hurt me out of spite and sow a seed of division to another. This was a person in our body of believers doing this. Did I correct them? There would have been no point because of their character (they are known for doing this). Instead I loved them and am choosing to walk in forgiveness.

When we mature we begin to walk continually in love [that is, value one another—practice empathy and compassion, unselfishly seeking the best for others], just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and sacrifice to God [slain for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance. There are times that I am going to have to work on this more and more. How we treat people matters to God. When I become an imitator of Him I do not have to fear grieving the Holy Spirit. I believe He is a God to be honored. I should honor Him with my full self, that includes my thoughts, words and actions.

2 Corinthians 3:17-18 (AMP) Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty [emancipation from bondage, true freedom]. And we all, with unveiled face, continually seeing as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are progressively being transformed into His image from [one degree of] glory to [even more] glory, which comes from the Lord, [who is] the Spirit.

Father, our Creator and Banner, You are so Marvelous. If we do nothing else but to just love You, that is all we need. Thank You for Your Son, for being the Restorer of our authority and fullness. Thank You for the Holy Spirit and the power that You have entrusted us with. We repent for not being imitators of You and for the words we have spoken in vain against Your body. Let our tongues be submitted to You. We are choosing to renew our minds daily in Your Word. Thank You for allowing us to partner with You in Your Kingdom expansion. We choose to see people the way You do. Let us have eternal eyes when we speak and treat Your people. Let us be true children of You and imitate You in all we say and do. We choose forgiveness today. We choose joy today. We choose hope today. We choose love today. In Jesus Name, Amen.

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Just the way you are

Philippians 4:8 (AMP)  Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].

This week I had a discussion with a friend and they were talking about how they desired to speak in a way that people would receive them. Like me, they feel like people do not receive them because they come off too harsh (just blunt). Their heart (and mine) is to say these things out of love and to point others towards Christ. There is no ill intent, just to make it plain.

Here is what I stated, and what I have to put in front of myself, we are all responsible for how we receive. Why is Paul making these statements on how to think? Paul has sent harsh letters of rebuke. He has sent letters of encouragement. He wrote the most quoted verses on love. Preceding the verses above he talks to the church about being anxious and worrying. He encourages them to live a life of thanksgiving to God. He tells us that we need to guard our hearts.

God created us with the personality that we have. When we draw close to Him we should grow in integrity and character. My character (moral nature) will align with His. My personality, the parts that make me unique to me, He loves. I do not need to try to be like someone else.

A few years ago I was going through a hard time with someone in the work place. I had led a meeting with our group about seeing value in each other, using the above verse. A couple of weeks later tension rose up again and one of the employees confronted me that she just did not like me. I asked her if she could see me through Philippians 4:8 and her response was that she could not. Being a Christians non-profit, this was not a good environment and I should have put in my notice, but I loved the organization. At that moment I realized that because of my personality she did not like me. Nothing I did was wrong. Now I could have done one of two things, I could beat myself up and sulk about not being a likable person or I could walk in confidence and knowing who I am in Christ and that the love walk means that although they may not like me I have value and so do they. I would like to say that I did the later, but the next six months were miserable there.

This is what I told my friend the other day, and what I wish someone would have said to me, are you speaking out of genuine love and and a desire to see them grow? If yes, then it is up to the one receiving to think on what is true, what is of value and what brings peace (especially if they are a brother and sister in Christ). We should be thinking of each other with the expectation that we want to see each other grow. We should challenge and encourage each other. It is the challenging part that we may not like, but we really do need.

Paul was not always liked, but he was what the people needed. You are too. You make an impact because of Christ in you. I am thankful for you and that God created you just the way you are.

Father, I thank you for creating me just the way that I am. I thank you that you put people in my life to challenge me and to encourage me to grow. I am rooted and grounded in the love of your Son, Jesus. I choose today to see the statements made to me, that encourage me to grow, as true, as honorable and worthy of respect I choose to confirm them by your word. I choose to see my bothers and sisters in Christ as pure and wholesome I choose to think on whatever is lovely and brings peace. Those that you have placed in my life are admirable and of good repute. There is excellence, there are areas worthy of praise and I will think continually on these things. You have implanted love in my heart and I thank you for opportunities to implant them into others.