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How we treat people matters

Ephesians 5:1-2 (AMP) Therefore become imitators of God [copy Him and follow His example], as well-beloved children [imitate their father]; and walk continually in love [that is, value one another—practice empathy and compassion, unselfishly seeking the best for others], just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and sacrifice to God [slain for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance.

How we treat people matters to God. I was in prayer yesterday and God told me to turn to Ephesians 4:30, “And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God [but seek to please Him], by whom you were sealed and marked [branded as God’s own] for the day of redemption [the final deliverance from the consequences of sin].” I am a context girl, so I read the verses around it.

Ephesians 4:29 (AMP) Do not let unwholesome [foul, profane, worthless, vulgar] words ever come out of your mouth, but only such speech as is good for building up others, according to the need and the occasion, so that it will be a blessing to those who hear [you speak]. 

Ephesians 4:31-32 (AMP) Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor [perpetual animosity, resentment, strife, fault-finding] and slander be put away from you, along with every kind of malice [all spitefulness, verbal abuse, malevolence]. Be kind and helpful to one another, tender-hearted [compassionate, understanding], forgiving one another [readily and freely], just as God in Christ also forgave you.

The Book of Ephesians was written to the church of Ephesus, which means it was written to people who had received Christ as their Lord and Savior. At the moment, my husband and I are in a series about Relational Maintenance and we are taking the verses from Ephesians 5 and breaking down how we can apply it to our every day lives. Like I said, I am a context girl and when I see the word “therefore” that means that this is not the starting point of the thought. We grieve the Holy Spirit when we are not becoming imitators of Christ. This is not referring to winning the lost, healing the sick and raising people from the dead. We have been given the authority to do that at sons and daughters, but it is not referring to your position as a child of God. As a child of God, that is an imitation of the Father, an ambassador (2 Corinthians 5:20). Does my character reflect His? There are two words in the Greek that are used for son, teknon and huios. Teknon refers to child or heir, huios refers to maturity and the mannerism taken on.

Can I grieve the Holy Spirit as a born again believer? Yes. How? By not maturing into huios, becoming an imitator of my Father. What are some checks in myself? When I am talking are my words building up? Do I take the chance to tell it like it is about someone? Do I repeat a wrong? Do I spread resentment or strife? I had someone do that to me recently and it has taken me a moment to think better about the person they were talking about. They said something to hurt me out of spite and sow a seed of division to another. This was a person in our body of believers doing this. Did I correct them? There would have been no point because of their character (they are known for doing this). Instead I loved them and am choosing to walk in forgiveness.

When we mature we begin to walk continually in love [that is, value one another—practice empathy and compassion, unselfishly seeking the best for others], just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and sacrifice to God [slain for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance. There are times that I am going to have to work on this more and more. How we treat people matters to God. When I become an imitator of Him I do not have to fear grieving the Holy Spirit. I believe He is a God to be honored. I should honor Him with my full self, that includes my thoughts, words and actions.

2 Corinthians 3:17-18 (AMP) Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty [emancipation from bondage, true freedom]. And we all, with unveiled face, continually seeing as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are progressively being transformed into His image from [one degree of] glory to [even more] glory, which comes from the Lord, [who is] the Spirit.

Father, our Creator and Banner, You are so Marvelous. If we do nothing else but to just love You, that is all we need. Thank You for Your Son, for being the Restorer of our authority and fullness. Thank You for the Holy Spirit and the power that You have entrusted us with. We repent for not being imitators of You and for the words we have spoken in vain against Your body. Let our tongues be submitted to You. We are choosing to renew our minds daily in Your Word. Thank You for allowing us to partner with You in Your Kingdom expansion. We choose to see people the way You do. Let us have eternal eyes when we speak and treat Your people. Let us be true children of You and imitate You in all we say and do. We choose forgiveness today. We choose joy today. We choose hope today. We choose love today. In Jesus Name, Amen.

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Is your delight conditional?

Job 22:25-26 (AMP) And make the Almighty your gold and your precious silver, then you will have delight in the Almighty, and you will lift up your face to God.

No one likes being miserable. If they do, then we have other issues. Some people crave drama and do not feel like they are valuable unless they are right in the middle of a mess. Some want to be the savior in life. We have a term down south called, “spilling the tea.” What does it mean to spill the tea? It is to share exclusive information about a situation or a person. Plain and simple it is gossip.

That is what I think of when I read the book of Job. He had friends around him that liked to “spill the tea.” He was going through some tough times. Take the above scripture and put it into context.

Job 22:23-30 (AMP) If you return to the Almighty [and submit and humble yourself before Him], you will be built up [and restored]; If you remove unrighteousness far from your tents, and place your gold in the dust, and the gold of Ophir among the stones of the brooks [considering it of little value], and make the Almighty your gold And your precious silver, then you will have delight in the Almighty, and you will lift up your face to God. “You will pray to Him, and He will hear you,
and you will pay your vows. “You will also decide and decree a thing, and it will be established for you; And the light [of God’s favor] will shine upon your ways. “When you are cast down and humbled, you will speak with confidence, and the humble person He will lift up and save. “He will even rescue the one [for whom you intercede] who is not innocent; And he will be rescued through the cleanness of your hands.”

Job’s friend had made an assumption, that Job had turned away from God and that is why he was going into such calamity. My question is: why do I follow the precepts of God? Is it so that nothing bad will happen to me? Is that our assumption when someone in our church is going through hard times? They must have displeased God. Not true.

Yes, there are areas that we misstep. Here is one such area that we can be flimsy with: Malachi 3:16, “Bring all the tithes (the tenth) into the storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test Me now in this,” says the Lord of hosts, “if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you [so great] a blessing until there is no more room to receive it.”

There have been a time that, although we tithe, lightning has struck our electronics and we had to spend $1000 to replace them. Then the next week the truck started shuttering and had to pay out another $650 to fix it. Was our allegiance to God questioned? Did we have a secret sin that needed to be repented of? Did we step out of His covering? Nope.

John 10:10 (AMP) The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].

Do you know what we didn’t do? We did not stop tithing, we did not stop giving, we did not stop serving, and we paid those bills with joy. Why? When you delight in Him, nothing the devil tries to steal will effect your position in Christ. We do not give to get. We give because of who He is. We serve because we love Him. We delight in Him no matter what comes our way. We do not change that when things are going good nor when things are challenging.

Psalms 119:16, (AMP) I will delight in Your statutes; I will not forget Your word. For I shall delight in Your commandments, which I love.

Philippians 2:17 (AMP) But even if I am being poured out as a drink offering on the sacrifice and service of your faith [for preaching the message of salvation], still I rejoice and share my joy with you all.

Job had done nothing against God to deserve such a tragedy, but have breath in his lungs. As long as we have breath in our lungs we have an enemy. It is not each other. The devil wants you to question God’s love for you. He wants you to question the Word. He wants you to question the standard of Christ. He wants you to think that you delighting in God does not really matter. It matters, but not in the way that we often think. It matters to chase His heart and face and not His hands. Job’s devotion to God was unconditional. The enemy is not trying anything new.

Ephesians 6:10-18 (AMP) In conclusion, be strong in the Lord [draw your strength from Him and be empowered through your union with Him] and in the power of His [boundless] might. Put on the full armor of God [for His precepts are like the splendid armor of a heavily-armed soldier], so that you may be able to [successfully] stand up against all the schemes and the strategies and the deceits of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood [contending only with physical opponents], but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this [present] darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly (supernatural) places. Therefore, put on the complete armor of God, so that you will be able to [successfully] resist and stand your ground in the evil day [of danger], and having done everything [that the crisis demands], to stand firm [in your place, fully prepared, immovable, victorious]. So stand firm and hold your ground, having tightened the wide band of truth (personal integrity, moral courage) around your waist and having put on the breastplate of righteousness (an upright heart), and having strapped on your feet the gospel of peace in preparation [to face the enemy with firm-footed stability and the readiness produced by the good news]. Above all, lift up the [protective] shield of faith with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.  And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.  With all prayer and petition pray [with specific requests] at all times [on every occasion and in every season] in the Spirit, and with this in view, stay alert with all perseverance and petition [interceding in prayer] for all God’s people.

Delighting in the Lord should not be conditional. We should not be asking for it to all end when we suffer. He does not punish us because of the low moments and He does not reward us in our highs. He is constant. He is immutable, never changing. He cares for us and loves us deeply. When we are deeply rooted in that love, the delight is unshakable. Our joy in in Him. Our satisfaction is in Him and not our conditions. We are to be inclined towards Him. Delight in Him!

Lord, You are our Creator and our Protector. You are our Banner of Love. Thank You for sending Your Son to set the standard of what it is like to delight in You. There is no one who suffered more without cause than Jesus, yet He kept His face towards You. Thank You for the power to overcome though the Holy Spirit. All is a gift from You because of Your Perfect Love. We repent for making our delight in You conditional. We repent for withholding our service, our relationships, our prayers and even our giving when we did not feel like it. We repent for making it about us. Thank You for Your Word piercing areas with fresh anointing oil. There is freedom in Your Word. We choose forgiveness today. We choose hope today. We choose love today. We choose joy today. We choose to glorify You today. In Jesus Name, Amen.

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Sisterhood of the wounded

James 3:10 (AMP) Out of the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. These things, my brothers, should not be this way [for we have a moral obligation to speak in a manner that reflects our fear of God and profound respect for His precepts].

Gossip is a hard thing not to do, especially among hurting people. I have done it, even within a week. What happens when two people get together that have been hurt by the same person. They share the hurts. Why do we think it is okay in the moment? It is because we think we are not sharing what the person does not already know about the other individual. It is a hard cycle to break, but I want to be better. I have a moral obligation to speak in a manner that reflects the fear of God regarding His created.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (AMP) Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening]. Love never fails [it never fades nor ends].

I did not release why I was hurt, until they released why they were. How can you forgive what cannot be forgotten? I am here to tell you it is hard, but forgetting is not what we are commanded, it is the forgiveness. It does not sting as much. I have learned to pray blessings over that individual. I pray that the Word becomes alive to them.

I know that the hurt was an attack of the enemy. Why? It came from the twisting of His Word. As leaders we should not feel that it is up to us to build the church. He does. When we use tactics to grow our churches, even though it may cause hurt (premeditated), we are wrong. Why? My growth should not see you as a stepping stone or a casualty to kingdom building. Notice it is not a capital K in kingdom here, because that is not His Kingdom we are building.

Philippians 2:3 (AMP)  Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit [through factional motives, or strife], but with [an attitude of] humility [being neither arrogant nor self-righteous], regard others as more important than yourselves.

This is just an example of how easy it is to rehearse it again. It is hard to forgive when you cannot forget. The enemy used a perfect tool here, another who has to respond to the Father just like you do (James 3:1). This is not the only hurt, but it was the most recent. I never wish that on anyone. I have to put my trust in God and who He calls, even if. I have hurt people, but instead of saying that it is part of ministry (which is not true, it is part of my imperfectness) I want to do better. I want to glorify Him. To hurt each other and call it ministry is false. We are to sharpen each other, not wound (Proverbs 27:17). It is to bring is closer in relationship to the Father.

Hebrews 4:12 (AMP) For the word of God is living and active and full of power [making it operative, energizing, and effective]. It is sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating as far as the division of the soul and spirit [the completeness of a person], and of both joints and marrow [the deepest parts of our nature], exposing and judging the very thoughts and intentions of the heart.

Let me always be sensitive to the Word. Even though I was hurt and was wrong it still does not give me the right to repeat the matter. It still does not give me the right to rehearse the matter. Why? I fear God more than my rights. I do not want to displease the Father, not because of fear of punishment, but because I honor Him. I honor His precepts. I honor His Word. I do not want to be so prideful that I exempt this area from His correction. I am looking for the best in those and speaking blessings over them. Praying for a deeper relationship for the Father. Praying for forgiveness for them as they will have to stand before the judgement seat, just like I will. Repenting and asking God to bridle my tongue when I start to rehearse (ultimately cursing with my mouth). Woah, to me when I do such a thing. Instead of creating a sisterhood of the wounded, let us be a sisterhood of the hopeful. Let us hope again! Let us praise again!

Abba, You are the Glory that we wake up and sing to every day. We long to be in Your Presence. Thank You for sending Your Son to be the Light and to restore us. We are sorry for making things about us. We repent for every time we rehearsed a wrong, whether it was for our gain or someone else’s. We are sorry for gathering together as wounded. Help us be to speak blessings over those who have done us wrong. We want to love deeply because You love deeply. Our awe of You compels us to follow Your Word. Holy Spirit Your voice to be louder than the voice of deception. The voice of deception will tell us to fight against flesh and blood. The voice of deception will tell us that because we do not forget that we will never forgive, therefore, never being pleasing to God. The enemy want us to stay walking wounded, but because Jesus overcame, we are over-comers. We choose forgiveness today. We choose love today. We choose hope today. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.